Keep Asking
I wrote last week about the everyday hero who saved me from a grand misadventure as I traveled from Munich to Zurich recently.
A week before that incident, I was again faced with some confusion, this time at a train station in Frankfurt. I had a ticket, but no idea which platform my train was leaving from. So I went to ask for help at an info desk.
The elderly guy there just fobbed me off, motioning that I should go look at the big schedule posted across the way. I did as I was told, but quickly realized that the schedule made about as much sense as a bottle of bananas. So, swallowing my pride, I went back to Opa at the info deak, apologized, and asked again for help.
He begrudgingly walked over with me to the schedule and, while pointing out an entry, told me to go to Platform 7. I thanked him in my best German accent and did just that.
At Platform 7, there was nothing to indicate that I was in the right place. So, just to be safe, I asked a couple of employee-looking dudes for a second opinion. They proved more helpful. One took me to his little kiosk office and printed off a schedule with two different options for trains to my destination.
Interestingly enough, none of them left from Platform 7. For whatever reason, the first guy — the elderly chap working at the information desk — had given me the wrong information.
The moral here is that you can’t be afraid to ask for help, and to keep asking. If you get a bad vibe from one answer, don’t just sigh and accept it. Go back and ask again. Failing that, go ask someone else.
Among other things, this also works for job hunting and flirting with attractive women in Amsterdam. Oh, so you’re really not interested? No worries, I’ll try someone else.
Remember: To get what you want, you might have to change how you ask and who you ask, but you must never stop asking.
Good stuff Nial,
I cringe at miscommunication and then get a hysterical case of the giggles.
Ask away,
Tali
Miss on the side of embarrassment and being wrong than missing altogether by doing nothing. Probably the best lesson one could ever learn.
As a not yet fully recovered shy, the situation you had in the station would have been very “painful” for me… Luckily our self-preservation sense push us to keep asking constantly and indiscriminately until we are satisfied forgetting about any form of shyness or pride. Good advice, Niall
Great lesson. This happened to me once while traveling through Turkey. I was at a very small station in a small town waiting for a connecting train. The man in the uniform that I asked whether I was on the correct platform didn’t seem interested in speaking English. He pointed me to the sign that was over my head, and nodded his head. I assumed this meant I was safe, but I felt like something was not right.
Anyway, it turned out that I was on the correct platform, but on the wrong train car. Apparently, there was a sign on the information board, as well as a series of announcements (not in English) telling me that the cars will split into two sections. The last two cars will go one way, while the other three will go the way I want. Crap. The guy on the car explaining this to me (in perfect English) after it’s too late was the guy standing next to me while I was asking the uniformed man for help. I saw him looking at me then, begging me with his eyes to offer help, but I was too shy to ask. Rather, I more-likely felt like I didn’t want to inconvenience him, especially after inconveniencing the employee. I ended up 3 hours off course, and spending the night in a small empty town (I arrived at midnight). Feeling down, I slept under a tree behind the station. Next time I’ll ask around
Wow, what a way to learn that lesson! For me in such a situation, the hardest part is asking someone else in front of the person you first asked. Because then you’re essentially telling the first guy that his response wasn’t helpful enough. Of course, that should be his problem and not mine, but those old people pleasing habits die hard!
I like it! Thanks for sharing!
This is somewhat funny, I did that just yesterday with dreamhost. They had still kept my account in pending status and even though they promised 2 weeks of trial before the annual plan starts, the end date was exactly a year after my sign-up. So, I asked them. And they responded within minutes ! My account started, and they fixed the trial period as well. Normally, I would have continued to wait and let it resolve by itself, but I didnt and it paid off.
Totally on board with you on the ‘keep asking’ thing. Maybe I should ask my boss now for a raise and a good bonus
You almost have to feel sorry for the first guy who “helped” you. ALMOST. He must hate his job so much or is so miserable in general that he would take pleasure in knowingly sending you in the wrong direction. Or it could be, in the same vein of men hating to ask directions, he just couldn’t admit to you he didn’t know the amswer to your question and was covering up instead. Either way it’s sad. I travel lots and find that people are usually chuffed to help. But every so often you get a guy like you met. Glad you went with your gut instead of getting on the wrong train!